Friday, January 4, 2008

If Tomorrow Starts Without Me

A tear or ten or thirty ran down my face as I sat at Carla's funeral. An unexpected rare disease ravaged her body. Christmas never came this year for Carla, but every day is Christmas for she communes with the Baby in the manger, her LORD, her Savior face-to-face every day for eternity. Brave Bob, her faithful husband, stood to speak tender words about his beloved wife. He humbly encouraged us all not to plan for retirement but to plan for the eternal. Carla never made it to retirement. He ended his little speech speaking tears and truth: "Give thanks in all things for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus." I Thes. 5:18 . How did he find such strength to get up on that church altar and say that. He spoke with such childlike trust. The love of their life is gone.


Carla lived well. This was the day she lived her whole life for. It just came quicker than we all thought it would. She is home. I've been thinking about the phrase for a few weeks now that He is our home. I can only find rest in my world in HIM. Our home is in heaven.


Carla asked her friend to read the poem, "If Tomorrow Starts Without Me." You can google the title and read the poem. Carla's "place" was ready. She got the call. It really is the best Christmas ever for Carla.

Psalm 90 says you are our dwelling place, oh God. You turn us back to dust...if only we knew the power of your anger. Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Have compassion on your servants. Satisfy us in this morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us. And Father, may your favor rest on us this moment, this year.

I've been thinking a lot lately that all I have is this present moment. This heartbeat. What is going on in the fray of this heartbeat? Am I really living in the present? Dealing with the frightful fray of my heart? Or do I today ignore my jealous eye, my demanding hand, my arrogant tongue. Have mercy on me, oh my good God, have mercy on me this freezing Texas morning! Soren Kierkegaard penned my thoughts this day, "And now, with God's help, I shall become myself."

19 comments:

Connie@Little Red Hearts From God 1/04/2008  

Beautiful...

yes, tomorrow starts with or without us, does it not...

how beautiful that we could know and LOVE ourself...

Oh, the homecomings...and goings.. they are but a fleeting moment of grueling pain and tearing of the heart...

beautiful Bev..thank you

Joyful Days 1/04/2008  

I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend. What an uplifting tribute & wise words to ponder.

Sharon 1/04/2008  

I see you have a contemplating heart.
I have been doing some real evaluating where I am --where I should be.
In the year King Uziah(?)died---a time of tenderheartedness. I am sorry for the loss of your friend. The waiting to see her again will be hard.
Reach in. Hold up your tender heart to your Daddy God and tell Him you want to see Him High and lifted up with His train filling the temple of your heart.
I pray that we all see that this year.
I will pray for this man who lost his love.

Nise' 1/04/2008  

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. May God comfort not only your grieving heart but the hearts of Carla's family as well.

helenw13 1/05/2008  

Bev,

So sorry to hear about the passing of your dear friend. I pray that you will find comfort and strength in the days to come and that it will be in increasing measure for her family as well.
Blessings to you, dear one,

Helen

Teri 1/05/2008  

Bev,
I pray that as you grieve the loss of your friend, that God continues to give you nuggets of truth.

Thank you for this post!
Hugs to you,
Teri

Susan 1/05/2008  

Have you been peeping into my journal again, Bev? You hit my heart right on.

Love you and praying for you (and Carla's family) this morning.

Praise Jesus that she knows Him and is now home with Him.

Susan

Teresa 1/05/2008  

You left a comment on my blog, and I'm terribly confused. Take a look at the comment on my blog "Losing Sleep And Other Things Pt. I" and you'll know what I mean...
was that meant for someone else?

Teresa

Kate 1/05/2008  

Thanks for your comments and your encouragement- it means more to me than I can tell you.

Toknowhim 1/05/2008  

Bev,

I have been on vacation and just returned.. I missed connecting with you through the blog this past week, but totally enjoyed spending time with my family.

How neat the thing you started with reading through the Bible. I cannot keep the exact commitment, but look forward to joining the discussions as I can.

I am sorry to hear about the loss of your friend, but I know that you will use even this situation to draw close to God.

Blessings and talk to you soon.

He Knows My Name 1/05/2008  

no matter our hope, which is comforting, we are still overcome by profound sadness when we lose someone. i am so sorry about your friend. may the comforter be a presence that is undeniable for you and her family.

~janel

Fran 1/05/2008  

Oh, sweet precious Bev.

I just felt the tenderness in your heart as I read each beautiful and true word you wrote.

Jesus is our home. May we dwell completely with Him while on Earth and anxiously await the moment we see Him face to face.

Live for Him in all that you do. Keep your heart and eyes passionately seeking after Him.

I'm praying for you. I'm praying for her family. May the peace of Christ rest on all of you.

Love you~
Fran

Ang baylis 1/05/2008  

We are so blessed to have God as our Savior so we can all look forward to going Home! What would we do without Him? I will look up that poem. I want to live in the present moment, too! Thank you for sharing your heart with all of us women in blogland!

Much love and I am so sorry for your loss!
Angie xoxo

Teresa 1/06/2008  

Don't be sorry - that's completely fine. But, know it wasn't me. I'd ask Kate if she knows for sure who it was and if they have a blog, maybe she knows and you can send a comment her way.

HIS daughter 1/06/2008  

Hi,
I saw you on the LPM blog and then on Michelle's blog. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend! My prayers are with you.

I saw on Michelle's blog you were going to see Jack Hayford. That must be exciting. Praying that is a huge blessing for you.

God bless you as you keep encouraging others!

Teri

jennyhope 1/06/2008  

I love this post and tribute to your friend. I so know what you mean about dealing with the heart. If we don't allow the Lord to tend to it...it truly will tend to us...and I have experienced that in not a good way. I want to live a life free of the entanglements of sin and run the race with endurance fixing my eyes on Jesus. I hate the times where I have willfully veered off into the ditch. Anyway, I am so sorry about your loss and you are so precious!!

Sharon 1/06/2008  

A little something for you on my site!

Lindsee 1/07/2008  

Oh, how I do desire truth in the inmost parts. :)

Love your posts Bev, and will try my absolute hardest to follow this with y'all.

(Oh, and p.s. a check is so on the way. Consider me the worst payer ever!)

Much love,

Linds

Fran 1/09/2008  

Just coming by to say hello and I'm about to spend time in prayer, with the Word and thinking of my precious siestas!!

I love ya Bev. Hope you are doing well. Have a wonderful day with Him going about life.

Hugs~
Fran

Praying for Our Friend Joanne Psalm 131:3 Waiting on God. Hope Now. Hope Always.

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