Monday Morning Cover to Cover.....the Lord is my Keeper - Psalm 121:5 and my feet are standing - Psa 122:2 so look til He Has Mercy on Me Psa 123:2

This will be my last post for Cover to Cover on this blog. I am MOVING Cover to Cover Monday Morning New Testament readings to another blog. I’m moving Cover to Cover to: http://covertocoverchronologically.blogspot.com/ You can also access it through my profile.

We finished reading the Old Testament this week. Nine months of lingering in the Word of God that changed our lives. It is not the word that changed our lives, it is the Person behind the words Who changed us all---The Living Word!. The psalmist wrote that His Word was like oxygen to us; like a hammer that broke our rocks to pieces; like a healing balm; and like melting snow melting our hearts. He sent His Word to us and healed us because we are greatly loved (Daniel 9:23). And, His Seal is on it. What a privilege to have journeyed with those of you who blogged on Monday mornings. You have no idea how much your comments have brought God to me! I cannot thank you enough for the challenge and encouragement of reading through the Old Testament chronologically with me. Please share with us for the last time on our journey through the OT, what lingers with you from this week.

If one word lingers with me from this week’s chronological readings, it is KEEPER. Psalm 121:5. “The LORD is your Keeper.” HE keeps me together when I have weeks like the one I’ve had. HE keeps me from all evil though HE allows some. HE keeps my life. HE keeps my going out and my coming back in. When I feel so lost, I can know, there is Someone Who is not sleeping tonight. He’s wide awake keeping my life. That so speaks to my moment. Psalm 122:2 – MY FEET ARE STANDING all because of my Keeper. Only HE could have done that from whence I came! Psalm 123:2 – So my eyes look to the LORD til HE has mercy on us. HAVE MERCY on me, o My God!

I went through a severe depression a couple of years ago and could not even stand up physically for a few weeks. But my beautiful God intervened and literally stood me up again. One verse He spoke to me through was: Psalm 147:10-11----His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse, nor his delight in the legs of a man; the LORD delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love. It’s not about how strong I am; it’s all about how strong HE is in me. The joy of the LORD is my strength. Neh 8:10. You could hear the sound of their rejoicing for miles away, they had such great joy – Neh 12:43. Wonder what sound comes from my life? God is not committed to our comfort; He is so committed to our deep joy in HIM.

Another verse in our chronological readings this week was one I remember well from a day of desperation about 15 years ago---I was freaking out over life, came to God, and randomly opened the Bible to that unknown verse…. Joel 2:12-13 “Return to me with all your heart…REND YOUR HEART, not your garment.” Don’t pull your hair out of your head, Bev. Live broken before ME and deal with the fray of your own heart. Who knows? He may turn and have pity. But, how I LOVE my Lord’s answer: I am sending you enough to satisfy you fully. I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten—my great army that I sent among you Joel 2:25. That so makes me think of Job and how God restored what His great Army took away. Yes, the day of the LORD is coming and I so want to live this day like it is. So what needs to go? Something has ruled my heart more than the Love of my God this week. I’m seeing it for what it is…and laying it down.

And our OT readings end in the Book of Malachi. “Guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with your wife.” Mal. 2:16 You have not set your hearts to honor your God. The LORD is listening and hears you as you talk with each other. A scroll of remembrance is being written in His Presence--- Mal. 3:16.

And so the OT closes with a prophecy: “The Sun of Righteousness will rise with healing in its Wings.” Mal. 4:1. It will be 400 years of silence after these inspired words fell on open ears. Waiting for the Sun.

If you would like to be a part of reading the New Testament chronologically with us, join us daily at Engage The Journey starting Sunday September 28th and ending December 31st. Come visit the blogsite at http://engagethejourney08.wordpress.com/ and take a look. You can blog daily with this online community and read or listen to the daily readings online. You don't even have to comment---we just want you to be in the Word with us if you are available. The blog has been a powerful tool to connect with our beautiful God Who is bending low to each of you. Then, on Monday mornings, you can weekly share one or two thoughts that LINGER with you from your readings on my new blog http://covertocoverchronologically.blogspot.com/ I’ll still be here with my “take” on life on this personal blog so I’m not moving, just Cover to Cover on Monday mornings is moving to another blog.

Please e-mail me (sixbrandons(at)sbcglobal.net) if you would like to participate in the chronological NT readings. Go to http://engagethejourney18.wordpress.com/ and take a look. This is not an accountability group. It is an invitation to read the Word together and ask God to show you what lingers in your heart. Malachi 4:1---surely the day of the LORD is coming and the Sun of Righteousness is so rising on you with healing!

Let me hear from you! Call or e-mail (cell numbers are listed at the bottom of my e-mails) with any questions. I’ve made this post way-too-long. I so want you to be in the Word of God and if this is for you, let me know.

Those of you who have journeyed through the Old Testament chronological readings, leave a comment here and tell us what it has meant to you. We are servants for the knowledge of the Truth which leads to godliness, changed lives---Titus 1:1-3. You are not the same person you were when you started nine months ago!

Rendezvous with Rest

Came over a hill and it was the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen in my few weeks in Austin. Spectacular! How can you not believe when you witness God's hand writing on the heavens. I gasped. Nature so stirs something so deep in me these days. As if God were saying, just for you and all the Austinites.

One of my favorite things in my short repertoire in town is walking Town Lake's 3-mile jaunt. The first time I went with a friend, I asked her if they were having a race that Monday morning. I have never seen so many scores of runners and walkers on a trail. It was a normal day at noon. I cannot believe the number of people who "workout" here!

Couldn't wait to walk this a.m. with a friend! I've kind of had a weird pain in my heel, right at the back of my arch, for about two months now but it always subsides when I exercise. Not this morning. Something happened and since that moment, I cannot put any weight on my foot. Crawled to dinner, fixed compliments of my husband. Oh dear me. I do hope this is really short-lived, like overnight. I feel weird asking for prayer for a heel ---but hey, I can't walk. And why would I be embarrassed about asking for prayer for a heel injury or for anything? Some things seem trivial, like heels. Really appreciate your prayers.

Every night about this time, God forces us to stop what we are doing and rest---sleep. We can't go without it. But when we are forced to rest in the daytime, there is something inside of me that feels trapped with all I have to do. Guess it doesn't have to be done, does it? The boxes to unpack will wait. I might miss the wedding this weekend. What does my God want of me? A rendezvous with Rest in my heart I know not.

Re-Defining Success on an Anniversary

My car battery is deader than a door nail on MOPAC. Husband is out of town. Kid needs to get to school---no car. Called a new friend. They not only loaned me a mini-van, they REPLACED and FIXED the corroded connector. Things happen when my husband goes out of town. Seems like the enemy of my soul is trying to discourage me. I don't want to live self obsessed about my needs in a new town. Have been on my face asking God to put closure on my past life of 33 years. We left town so quickly. Moved in a micro minute to MOPAC. Didn't get to say goodbye to so many people I truly loved. I'll be honest---it's really difficult. I'll be humble---my beautiful God is so present, how can I complain about anything.

We went with new friends to the UT football game (TU for Brookie). Woohoo! 97,000 people there...an ocean of orange (and I was in the wrong color). Behind me, I heard a couple talking about church planting. I could see the wife's pink shirt out of the corner of my eye. I liked her spunk instantly. I was curious, so I stole a peek to see if their faces were young or old. OH MY! It was a couple we so love that we haven't seen in maybe 20 years. We exchange Christmas cards every year and have kept up by snail mail. Boomer Sooner graduates and friends from our former church in Fort Worth---they had gone to Nebraska to plant a church there. One of their kids was an Aggie and the others were Huskers and Sooners. Right smack behind me---the aggiesoonerhuskermom were AGGIESOONERHUSKERparents. We caught up on our children who are about the same age.

Then the guy said to me something I don't think I'll forget for a long time! I'll think about it every time I pass that UT Stadium and every time I say "Hook 'em Horns" (and according to Brookie, that may not be often). The guy leaned over to my ear and said: I just asked God why he would put you in front of us with 97,000 other people here. HE said to tell you that people from your past really care about you. In light of the silence in my life, I can't tell you how much that meant to me from my beautiful God. This guy had no idea what he was saying to me that would sink so deep in me (Psalm 51:6). So deep.

We can't define our story by how people deal with us. We can't define our lives by our circumstances. I cannot define success by measurable results like numbers and noses.

Today is our 29th anniversary with my sweetheart. I get so nostalgic and evaluative. What have we built together. Maybe I should say what has God done in our hearts---oh my, that is so HUGE! New hearts! I can define my life by the peace I have in my heart that no man can steal; the rendezvous with Rest I know that is so real. The Presence of our beautiful LORD that is worth more than anything this life gives to me. Happy Anniversary to a sacrificial unselfish surrendered guy that I have the privilege of walking alongside for three decades now---he's the real thing. I know.

God sent His word and gave some perspective to me in that UT stadium, and I think a little bit of healing occurred at that Longhorn game. I barely knew who they were even playing, but it was one of those games I'll remember for the rest of my life. He so stirred my heart for His world! Take my eyes off of myself and revive me in your ways! Psalm 119:37

Monday Morning Cover to Cover

God reminded me at the UT football game that I can't look at things as they are. Can't evaluate what I see with my own eyes. I must look to HIM who is UNSEEN. Matt 6:6 says pray to Him Who is unseen. 2 Cor 4:18 Fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. I learned a precious truth at that game (it's in the next post) that I can't make decisions by what I see.

There are so many verses that jumped off the pages as we read the chronological Bible this week. But here are a few that linger with me in my melancholy mood this morning.

DO I KNOW THAT MY GOD IS COMMITTED TO MY DEEPEST JOY... Esther 8:17 Know that God grants seasons of favor for His people in order to extend His Kingdom not for our personal benefit. God is not committed to my comfort but HE is committed to my deepest joy. Esther "loved not her life" and gave herself to fasting and prayer "to break the powers that be." Invited to touch the "scepter" and, this day, we are invited to touch the "hem."



AM I EXCHANGING MY GLORY FOR STUFF?
Psalm 106:20 so lingered with me---they exchanged their glory for worthless stuff. Made me think how we exchange the glory of God in our lives every day for other passions. What rules our heart this day? And verse 21 says, they forgot the God who saved them, the One Who did great things for them. But even in that, God took notice of their distress, our distress, when He heard our cries. Whatever tears have rolled down your cheek this week, they are noticed. Out of His Great Love, He relents. It's not about us doing all the right things to get HIM to move and make something happen. It's all about staying connected to HIM and exchanging our lives for eternal things.

DO YOU KNOW GOD'S HAND IS ON YOUR LIFE?
Ezra spoke several times about the gracious hand of his God on them all 7:27 and 8:18 and 8:31. I don’t know what it is about hearing that God’s Hand is on me, but it so touches me in deep places to know it is. So what did Ezra say when he realized God’s Hand was on him??? I will proclaim a fast (8:21) so that we might humble ourselves before our God and ask him for a safe journey for us and our children, with all our possessions. In verse 22, Ezra said he was ashamed to ask the king for soldiers and horsemen to protect them from their enemies.” So in v. 23, it says: we fasted and petitioned our God about this, and he answered our prayer. God is stirring in my heart a desire to go to Him for protection and help in all my needs. I have a huge need in my life today and with tears rolling down my cheeks, I won’t call anyone this morning—I’ll leave it on His lap. Let God help me, not man.


WILL YOU SEND YOUR WORD TO HEAL US, O GOD?
Psalm 107:14 He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom, and broke away their chains. When Christ invaded my life a few decades ago, I was in such darkness and Light came through. A couple years ago, I was in such deep gloom and again God broke away the chains. I love verse 20, He sent forth his word and healed us! And one word he sent me at that time was Psalm 107: 28-30 through Patty. She never knew how her words sunk deep into my soul. Tonight, when I read them in this reading, God’s Presence was so real. He sent His Word again tonight to say that when I cried out to him in my trouble, He brought me out of distress. He stilled my storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed.


WHAT DO I DO WITH THE WORD OF GOD?
What lingers with me from reading Psalm 119: Verse 11 I have hidden your word in my heart and verse 18, I will not neglect your word. Verse 49 "Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope." I hold such hope in my heart this morning even in the midst of what I face.

DO I VIEW SUFFERING AND PAIN as MY ENEMY or FRIEND?
Psalm 119:71 It was good for me to be afflicted, so that I might learn your Word.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?
Nehemiah 2:5 - the King asked Nehemiah: "What do you want?" I want to rebuild the city. What passion rules our heart this day? Do we want to rebuild the lives of our friends and lovers who have piled up messes? Nehemiah says in 1:4 that when he heard what had happened to the people, he sat down and wept and mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven to let His ear be attentive. Like Esther, Nehemiah believed his words could make a difference and change God's mind. He even confessed the people's sin and his own sin. What do we want this day? Just listen to your prayers. Confess what's off track. The God of Heaven is listening.

God, would you let your ears be attentive and eyes open to hear what my friends say this very day and act in their behalf.

AggieSoonerHuskerMom

UPDATE: 97,000 peeps in the stadium and this AggieSoonerHuskerMom sat directly in front of a Sooner couple who have been Huskers for the past 20 years. I knew them. Just wait til you hear this story on Monday morning. God was so at that stadium today and I'll never forget His Presence in that UT seat---He encouraged my heart so deeply! I like these UT games! But I'll always be an aggie and a sooner and a husker in my heart.

This aggiesoonerhuskermom is on her way to the University of Texas football game, compliments of my new friends here. I'm going to be with them and witness this TU mania....excuse ME, UT devotion. I'm really excited about going! I don't know what to wear cause all my t-shirts are from those OTHER 3 schools in the Big 12! I better not wear the BEAT TEXAS one! This is a new wrinkle for me cause I am going to cheer for the school that I have always cheered against. We live in Austin now, so I guess I have to add UT to my list---and my 3 older children are groaning if you are reading this! I'll always be an AggieSoonerHuskerMom!!!! And may I add that your little brother has become totally enmeshed and engrossed and engaged in becoming an Aggie! Whoop! I'm so confused, I hope I don't whoop at the game. After all, all I know is hullabaloo caneck caneck...will they sing that? Ha.

Mo Pac Mama

Blogger has this new follower widget feature. If you stop by here and read my blog from time to time, would you click on "Follow this Blog." I'd like to follow your blog and it would be so easy for me to click on you. It's on the left sidebar at the top. I'm real visual and to click on your picture to get to your blog makes blogging a little more accessible for me.

Maybe I'll change my blog name to MoPacMama...we officially live on MoPac. I've only moved once in my life. Living in Fort Worth for 33 years and not being there anymore, it's strange. I keep wanting to go upstairs to check on the kids, but three of them are gone anyway. There is no upstairs. I feel like I am on vacation waiting to go back home, except we don't have a home there anymore. My three adult children don't have their bedrooms to come home to. Gone. And I could not be any more grateful to my good God for helping me continue to move on. He never intended for me to be attached to anything but Him. He has so carried me through this and has answered two prayers of mine unbelievably. Only He could have done it! Reading Ezra 8-10 today meant so much to me---Ezra talked about going to God when difficult things happened, not going to people. I so saw God come through for me this week as I went to HIM.

Barrett flew home from France last night. I'm so glad to have him back or so I thought! So missed seeing him as he landed in Fort Worth. So we missed him. His long training time in France ended with their team winning a national title in their division. So glad he's on American soil again. Except, he is on his way to China. Oh dear me. Everyone will be home for Thanksgiving, including Brookie! We just can't decide where...all their friends are in Fort Worth. We hear that Jessica and Steph are somewhere here!

Went to watch Britt play basketball tonight. I'm so grateful to my son for jumping in to his junior year at a new school with both feet planted firmly in trusting his God. The first couple of days at school were tough as the girls were way more relational than the guys. But by the end of the week, he was alive and active. Can't compare this to what he had. He had been with the same friends K through 10th in Fort Worth. We miss Ben and Andrew and Ethan and Greg more with each passing day! Britt had one week notice that God was in this for us. Britt said---I'll look on it as a journey and he so has! Trying to live in the present!

And in just a couple of hours, it's my husband's birthday! We had our birthday dinner for him tonight. Had a staff birthday party in my new home last week. I told Bob that he has provided so well for all of us over the years. Isaiah 33:6 - Jesus has given me much stability in my life through my husband. A faithful guy. No one can outserve him. Talk about not loving your own life---he so puts his family before his own needs. It has been a great privilege to walk alongside of this servant. A shepherd after His Heart. Happy Birthday sweetheart! Thank you for being like that tree in Psalm 1 giving shade and protection and shelter to your family and to many. May your roots continue to go down deep this year and you find Rest by that tree of life.

Signed: MoPacMama

Monday Morning Cover to Cover

One month without internet! It wasn't self-imposed; it's just that we are in transition from Fort Worth to Austin. I've scoured to find the FREE WIFI signs in so many Austin restaurants. So, I'm a little sporadic, late here... and there. Haven't been able to comment much since LPL. We went back to our home in Fort Worth this weekend to finish up the garage and stuff while our renter graciously vacated for 24 hours. Three children moving home from college with all their household multiplied with my own stuff in the past year. Going through 33 years of my life has been eye-opening, exhausting, challenging, chilling, hilarious, and heart-wrenching. I have seen photos and memorabilia I don't think even happened. LOL. And which boy (they looked identical just in different generations) is it here in this picture? I was moving so F A S T yesterday that I accidentally flooded my kitchen, forgetting to turn off the water in the sink, while we grabbed a bite to eat at a restaurant. Oh dear me. Pray for me as we close this chapter on my life. May I allow my beautiful Lord Who has so called us here to write the final words of the chapter. The ending has been harder on me than I ever expected. But, by God's grace, I am standing strong---and that's HIM! So moved by the story we read of Esther "standing" in His Grace.

DID YOU EXPECT MUCH BUT IT TURNED OUT TO BE LITTLE
For those of you who stopped by for the chronological readings, here goes. What I have LOVED about reading the chronological Bible is just what we read this week in Ezra 4 about how the enemies hired counselors to make the people fearful and frustrated. But who enters in the midst of their discouragement over their work on the Lord’s building being halted. God’s messenger--- Haggai. And I would have not known who Haggai was speaking to if it had not been for this chronological reading. The Lord’s messenger delivers startling words that apply to us this September 2008: “Give careful thought to your ways… You expected MUCH but it turned out to be LITTLE. What you brought home, I blew away” because you were so busy building your own house and your own stuff in this world. A blowing thought to me as I unpack and unbury and reduce 33 years of living in 3400 square feet to 1250 square feet of stuff in my home and heart.

DO YOU KNOW YOUR BEAUTIFUL LORD IS STIRRING YOU UP
God called for drought in Haggai 1:11. And what happened? The people obeyed and feared God in their troubles. So HE came back to them and said: “I am with you.” And He stirred up their spirits. If God has allowed trouble in our lives this day, what great encouragement these verses are. For HE is saying to you and to me this very moment, “I am with you.” He is stirring up your spirit. That so moves me! Zech. 1:2 - Return to your LORD and HE will return to you!
OH!

AM I LOOKING AND LIVING FOR FORMULAS FOR THIS LIFE
The story of Esther's intercessory prayer for her people will linger in my thoughts and heart. Fasting and prayer moved the hands of her beautiful God for Esther LOVED NOT her own beautiful and power-filled life. She lived surrendered to her God. When she fasted, it wasn't for herself. We read in Zech. 7:5 this week that the LORD asked them about when they fasted: Was it really for Me? "It may seem marvelous to you" what you are doing for God, but "does it seem marvelous to God?" Zech 8:6. "The eye of my God is watching over all our going in and out." Ezra 5:5.

WHERE HAS GOD BROUGHT YOU TO ON THIS DAY
Esther 4:14 resonates so deeply in the place where I am. “If you keep silent at this time”…you’ll perish. “And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” Esther’s response—I’ll go on. I'll stand. If I perish, I perish.

AM I TOUCHING THE SCEPTER, TOUCHING THE HEM
Esther was invited to "touch the scepter." You and I are invited to "touch the hem." But we all want formulas, don't we? Tell me how to walk with God, have a great marriage, raise awesome kids, while having a powerful ministry impact. This is no formula kingdom that we live in. No formula structure for Esther---she fasted and prayed. Just like the Daniel we just read about---the one you could always find on his knees.

AM I SURRENDERED TO HIS SPIRIT WITH OPEN HEART, HANDS FOLDED
It is the Spirit of God at work in Esther to produce such humility and allow the Spirit to pour out His Love through her—Romans 5:5 is the cross ref—we have that same Spirit today so wanting to pour His Love in and through us. Psalm 105:4 “Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His Presence continually.” When we need it, He will say “touch not my anointed ones.” 105:15. He may send darkness 105:28. He may strike down 105:33. I don’t begin to comprehend what and how God works but it’s not all the guaranteed blessings that Christians talk about. And here comes another beautiful alliteration: He will spread a cloud for covering and fire for light by night 105:39. HE is LIFE, Living Water. He opens the Rock, water gushes out, flows through a desert like a river. They asked and HE gave bread from heaven in abundance. 105:40.

DO I KNOW THIS DAY THAT MY GOD IS FIGHTING FOR ME, INTERVENING
Zech 9:10 - "His dominion shall be from sea to sea.” How our beautiful LORD advances His Kingdom through us is a divine mystery. Yet, our obedience in telling and living out the Gospel in both word and action and prayer makes the kingdom’s advance visible. Oh my goodness!!! So what will I do with this Christ this day? The prophet Zechariah paints a beautiful picture in chapter 14 of our God Himself intervening in our lives and fighting for us. His “feet…on the Mount of Olives.” A picture of the split mountain and of the streams of Living Water that flow from Jerusalem for me and for you. Our LIVING WATER—-the Holy Spirit overflowing into our lives on this very day. He is the King over all 14:16-20 and in the end, every mouth will move before HIM to Whom we must all give account. “On that day there will be one LORD, and his name the only name.”

Austin Java

We made the "furniture move" this weekend and it's my first day in my new home! These past three weeks living out of a suitcase have been eventful. I could share with you more if you were here in person, suffice it to say it has been a tough chapter to close in moving to Austin.

Our new church family could not have embraced us any more fully than they have. Welcome baskets. An army-load of manpower to move us "in." A precious time to share in church. Breakfasts at Austin Java and Dinners at Chuy's. I adore the women I have met! The "new thing" God is doing could not be any more exciting for me. Tears are pouring down my cheek as I experience the goodness of God already in bringing us home.

We spent the past three weeks with no internet in a Guest House on a goat farm near Dripping Springs. A knock-dead gorgeous ranch where we met a dear couple and these ranchers will be our lifelong friends. God really met me on that goat farm. I remember one special morning where I was spending some time with Him dealing with some "stuff" in my life. I knew I couldn't go to anyone with it but Him first! I was on my knees repenting and crying out for mercy. I so sensed His Presence and a release of His Spirit. I got up off my knees and right outside my window were a pair of deer looking right my way as though He sent them. And I began singing "My Soul Thirsts After You." As the deer pants for the water, so my soul...

God had just spoke to my heart through Daniel 9:23. "At the beginning of your pleas for mercy, a word went out...and I have come to tell it to you. For you are greatly loved." I'm learning to go to Him with my sorrows, my woes, and hear Him before I rely on friends. As Brennan Manning says: if nothing matters more than hearing the Word of God, nothing matters more than listening.

So, I'm back hooked up again with internet and cell phone range. And God has provided beyond what I could have imagined!

Monday Morning Cover to Cover

Somewhere on the Goat Farm, I lost my whole week of writing notes on our chronological readings. If I had done it on paper, I could say the goats ate it; however, I think Dell ate it all up. It has disappeared right off of my computer screen forever. No way I can duplicate it.

So, I'll share with you from my heart what lingers with me from last week's chronological readings. Daniel 9:20 I will long remember. "While I was speaking and praying and confessing my sin and presenting my plea before His Holy Hill," the LORD said to me through Daniel 9:22 "Oh, I have now come out to give you INSIGHT and UNDERSTANDING. I was so moved by Daniel's decision to come before His Lord three times each day. Come to the window that faces Jerusalem. And Daniel found his God there.

I am profoundly marked by Daniel's story. Last week is now a blur but it was one of the hardest weeks for me, right up there with my "Top 10" hardest weeks ever. I went to Him, not to any man ... and God so showed up for me! Yes, He came to give insight and understanding and it was not in the ways I imagined. Silly me for scripting what I think should happen. Sovereign God working through His ways, not my ways.

When I read the next verse, Daniel 9:23, you could have heard me gasp on the Goat Farm as I sat watching the goats feast on their dinner. Every time I gasped or sobbed, they would stare. And Truth settled deep into my heart, Psalm 51:6. "At the beginning of your pleas for mercy, a word went out. And I have come to tell you for you are greatly loved." I have struggled my whole life with feelings of worthlessness. My beautiful God has so invaded my mess and I know that I know that I know that I am greatly loved. And once again, my beautiful LORD came to me in that moment with a word for I AM greatly Loved and so are you!

And there was one other verse that just jumped right off the pages. Psalm 126. Amazing to think something written so very long ago was written for me this very week of my life. God has brought me home and I am like a woman who dreams. I have a dream deep in my new heart. My mouth is filled with laughter I’ve cried many tears in the past 3 weeks, but those who sow in tears will reap in joy and my heart is so full of unexplainable joy. Only God could have shifted my sorrow-filled heart. So grateful to our good sovereign God for bringing us here! The LORD has done great things for us and we are filled with joy!!!!

Monday Morning Cover to Cover

I love reading blogs on Monday mornings when someone writes about how God spoke through what their pastor said in Sunday’s sermon. So, I’ll tell you what so touched me yesterday. My new pastor spoke about 2 Cor. 7:10. The kind of sorrow that God wants, it makes people change their lives and heart. Godly sorrow over ways we’ve tried to make life work. It so resonated in my heart. Something shifted that makes me want to change. It was a beautiful Sunday I’ll remember for a long time.

As I did my bible study this week reading the chronological Bible readings, what lingers with me is the story of Ezekiel and the dried up bones. Over and over, God calls Ezekiel “son of man” to show that he is like any other man. The hand of the LORD was on Ezekiel and He set him down in a valley of dry bones. “Son of man, can these bones live?” Prophesy over them and tell them to hear the Word of God. God will cause breath to enter and dry bones shall live. So Ezekiel prophesied and from dry bones an exceedingly great army stood to their feet. I can hardly imagine Ezekiel witnessing that. Dried up bones and our hope is lost. “You will know that I am the LORD when I open your graves and raise you from your graves.” Ezekiel 37:3-14. You shall live. Hallelujah! For A Savior who rose from the grave and raises us up to stand as an army who fights together the beautiful fight of faith. Come alive, o army of God. Stand up. Take hope. There’s hope for me in what I face this day, this moment.
Another passage that gripped me was Jeremiah 30. Why do I cry out over my hurt? My pain is incurable. My guilt is too great. My sins are flagrant. Jer 30:15. I’ll restore you and heal your wounds because you think that no one cares. 30:17. I’ll have compassion on you. 30:18. I’ll make you draw near to ME and you shall approach Me for who would dare of himself to approach Me…and I will be your God 30:22. You survived the sword and found grace in the wilderness. When you sought rest, the LORD appeared from far away and said: “I have loved you with an everlasting Love, therefore, I have continued my faithfulness to you.” 31:2-3 With weeping you shall come back to Me and I’ll make you walk in a straight path in which you shall not stumble 31:9.
Oh, that I would not lift up my eyes to idols of security, comfort, prestige, approval, entitlement, validation. Ezekiel 33:25. “From all your idols I will cleanse you. And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will put My Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my Word” - Ezekiel 36:25-27. Oh how I want to cling to this truth! Hold fast to it! Let my beautiful God purge me. It’s the kindness of our God that leads us to repentance. Romans 2:4.

Ezekiel went on to say in 34:2-4 Ah, shepherds who have been feeding yourselves! Should not shepherds feed the sheep? Ezek 34:2. Find and feed: the weak. the sick. the injured. the strayed. the lost. (Makes me think of Jenny Hope going to help people at the gas station, at Wal-Mart. We don’t have to look very far, do we?) And I’ll end with the beautiful verse from the Holy One…I Myself will seek you out and rescue you from the places where you have been scattered on a day of darkness. Ezekiel 34:12. “I Myself will be the shepherd of my sheep and I Myself will make them lie down. I will seek the lost. I will bring back the strayed. I will bind up the injured. I will strengthen the weak. I will feed them in justice.” Ezekiel 34:15. Hallelujah!

May God make this sheep lie down today and lead a quiet life, my new life in Austin. May HE bind you up, strengthen you, and feed you in justice. Have a great holiday today!